Where does my Creativity go when not creating?
It wanders around in my head, like smoke in a room, looking for an open window to slither out of…a song….a teardrop…a rumble of thunder, always there….always seeking a path of any kind to find its way through to a page, a canvas, a wall, a floor…..anywhere to leave a message or a mark….Just to say….I am…..
Now that my Sisters are all safely home, (missing them all dearly) I Have some time to do some painting and some scrapbooks to sell for Christmas, I did get a commercial license from Kathy to use her “Build A Page” system for making and selling scrapbooks, so I intend on making as many as I can, and try to find a consignment store that would sell them.
So its been drizzling all day, I have been sneezing, and I have been feeling down today, perhaps too much sleep? I also had a new script from the doctor for my thyroid medication, meaning my thyroid is not where it should be…..which could have something to do with my mood….and also the fact that each time my sisters and I go back to our homes and lives I miss them, but its OK, at least we DO get the time we spend together, some don’t have that opportunity or pleasure. I didn’t sleep well last night, probably because I slept TOO well for 2 whole days!
I honestly don’t know how people cope as they get old, and everyone they know slowly disappears until it seems like its only you left, knowing the only one left to depart this strange new world is yourself….My Aunt is 81, and has outlived all her siblings, cousins, and husbands, She only has one son and he is not in the best of health, yet she still appears to be outwardly cheerful and happy. I wonder if I can do that as well? I feel mortality sneaking up and it sometimes scares the crap out of me, and at the same time….I am at peace. I suppose I just don’t want to suffer, I don’t want to die…..but I don’t want to be the last one standing at the station waiting either…..? Make sense?
Had a dream with a lot of oddity’s in it last night: Going on a trip and trying to decide what Art Supplies I can fit in a suitcase, Having round worms and throwing them up (ewwww) a warthog playing in a kiddie pool in my front yard, Putting Rich black soil around a neighbors plant to help it grow, trying to buy something and the woman thought I was trying to steal it (REALLY rude too I might add)….when I came back and paid for it I reached out and burned her hair? (really I am not mean like that) I wonder what my subconscious is trying to tell me?!
I doodled last night when I couldn’t sleep, but I will post that photo tomorrow. Its time to relax and try to get in GO mode when Dave returns to work. Goodnight and have a GREAT…..YOU KNOW WHAT DAY IT IS!! Day! Leaving you with a Photo: Two of our Amigos!